Tropics of Exchange

I Save All Old Wallets

2012-02-15T09:55:00.001-08:00

My apartment looks like a vintage toy shop.

My three friends love looking at my stuff.

I recently tossed 20 pairs of reading glasses.

I tossed all the mislabeled VHS tapes,

I tossed many empty boxes,

& I’ve made major progress.

Now I notice it, but does anyone else?

I really don't care, I suppose.

I collect Nancy Drew books and stuff,

Girls series books, Barbie dolls

Golden books, anything Beatles

Lunch boxes, books of every genre,

Every card or letter I received as an adult,

(I tossed the envelopes),

Disney pins, vintage board games,

Art supplies, teaching stuff,

(Great profession for pack rats),

Vintage cartoon coloring books,

Boxes everything came in, cool paper,

Tapes from my Spanish classes

(My wonderful professor died young),

Vintage magazines, craft magazines,

Mom's stuff, cassette tapes,

Old prescription bottles.

Outdated software will never be useful.

The computer industry keeps changing.

I used to collect pig salt and pepper shakers.

I don't know why, so I sold them.

I collect nature things, leaves, pods and such.

I guess, like many others, books are my biggest issue,

Now I only keep ones that I read over and over again,

The Bible and Dianetics and The Descent of Man.

I'll be totally honest with you.

The collection causes me no distress.

Some of it though really has to go!

People are open and friendly.

I used to be significantly worse.

I watch "Hoarders" on A&E,

& I get up in the middle of the show

& start tossing!

It is the supreme motivator for me.

For a few years I lived with next to nothing,

& I was not happy.

Minimalism is great for some people

But it's not for me.

Being a collector may imply

I have it more under control

& I am getting there.

I collect all sorts of Mickey Mouse stuff.

A friend of mine and I used to one-up each other

"Oh, where did you get that? I want one, too!"

Two grown adults! Overgrown kids!

The Disney parks are full of us!

Kids can be easily trained to put their toys away.

They are good at it. I have seen them.

I try to give them stickers.

I have a small coin collection.
There are fewer than ten coins,

But they are all special five and ten centime pieces,

Counter-stamped with the Pears soap logo.
I don't need any more of them

& I don’t need them anymore.

I talked to Tom Clancy one day in an AOL chatroom.

It was neat. I asked him for Harrison Ford's phone number.

Small things are meaningless to others but precious to me.

I still have the positive pregnancy tests & hospital bracelets

Of kids who are now in elementary school.

I don't collect them, though.

I have no intent of adding to those I already have.

Like my hand-blown glass octopus from Laguna Beach.

I have to confess it now.

Something happened,

& it has become a collection.

I attended a job fair in high school

& walked away with promotional stress-relief toys;

One was shaped like a human heart.

Then for 50 cents I bought a yellow smiley face stress ball.

Then I came into possession of a cow,

A bunch of grapes, and a slot machine

(That is, stress balls shaped like these things),

& the other day I went to a donut shop

That didn’t accept credit cards for purchases under $5,

So impulsively I bought a donut stress-relief toy.

I keep them in my home office desk drawer.

They don't cause much clutter,

& I think they are hilarious,

But it's starting to weird-out my girlfriend.

I can't think of anything else I actively collect,

But there are things I save that I won't get rid of.

As a kid I collected a lot of random things,

Decorative pencil sharpeners, etc.

My collection is now a collection of collections.

Patches from the national parks and museums

Are all sewn onto the lab coat that I always

Intend to wear on the first day of school.

But it’s always too hot on the first day of school.

I made the mistake of telling people that I liked unicorns

When I was 18, which was a mistake.

I have three left. Two could be sold online,

One is blown glass, but it's so tiny that it's pointless.

I love rocks too. I have a farmer I get mine from.

I don't consider it weird or unusual though.

I save all old wallets.

I have a wallet from 5th grade with Beatles cards in it.

I have collected shells for years

& have made a shell frame mirror.

I delude myself that someday

I will make a large mirror with my collection

& maybe I will, who knows,

but I certainly don't have time now.

So the shells are in a set of plastic drawers

In the room I use for crafts and meditation.

I was quite talented with pen and ink.

I have a lot of my step-mother's paintings.

It's understandably hard to get rid of them.

I am neither a professional artist nor a true collector.

I am a musician who is, among other things,

working on the revision of a book,

which has just been accepted for publication.

I used to collect orchids for years

Until I stopped being in denial:

I don't have enough light or humidity for them,

Which is why they refused to flower again

& died long, lingering deaths.

A collection of computer viruses,

On 5 1/2 inch floppy disks,

All collected in the wild.

A collection of bowling teams shirts,

But only ones from funeral homes.

I'm afraid to get rid of any sort of cable.

I have one large blue bin overfilled with cables.

The hard-to-find-back-then shadow of sentience

Decorates a small tree every year at the holidays.

My son's teeth were so much bigger than his sister's.

I still have them tucked away in my jewelry case.

At Mr. Hinchman's

2011-09-11T19:24:00.000-07:00

Early shadows—
An unmerciful enemy—
The miseries of the curse—
Sorrow and gloom—
What religion robs man of—
What it does—
What it does not do—
Surrounding evils—
Blighted homes—
A Titan devil—
The utterness of the destroyer—
A truthful narrative—
"Stingeth like an adder."

Birth, parentage and early education—
Early childhood—
Memories vivid—
Bitter desolation—
An active but uneasy life—
Breaking colts for amusement—
Amount of sleep—
Temperament has much to do in the matter—
The author to blame for his misspent life—
Inheritances—
The excellences of my father and mother—
The road to ruin not willfully trodden—
The people's indifference to a great danger—
My associates—
What became of them—
The customs of twenty years ago—
What might have been.

The old log school house—
My studies and discontent—
My first drink of liquor—
The companion of my first debauch—
One drink always brings the next—
Religion is a horrible slavery—
A horseback ride on Sunday—
Raleigh—
Return home—
"Dead drunk"—
My parents' shame and sorrow—
My own remorse—
An unhappy and silent breakfast—
The anguish of my mother—
Gradual recovery—
Resolves and promises—
No pleasure in religion—

The hopelessness of the believers' condition—
The resistless power of appetite—
Possible escape—
The courage required—
The three laws—
Their violation and man's atonement.

School days at Fairview—
My first public outbreak—
A schoolmate—
Drive to Falmouth—
First drink at Falmouth—
Disappointment—
Drive to Smelser's Mills—
My opinion of patent medicines—
Boasting—
More liquor—
Difficulty in lighting a cigar—
A hound that got in bad company—
Oysters at Falmouth—

& what befell us while waiting for them—
Drunken slumber—
A hound in a crib—
Getting awake—
The owner of the hound—
Sobriety—
The Vienna jug—
Another debauch—
The exhibition—
The end of the school term—
Starting to college at Cincinnati—
My companions—
The destruction wrought by companions—

A warning—
A dangerous fallacy—
Byron's inspiration—
Lord Brougham—
Sheridan—
Sue—
Swinburne—
Dr. Carpenter's opinion—
An erroneous idea—
The best aid to thought.

Quit college—
Shattered nerves—
Summer and autumn days—
Improvement—
Picnic parties—
A fall—
An untimely storm—
Crawford's beer and ale—
Beer brawls—
County fairs and their influence on my life—
My yoke of white oxen—
The "red ribbon"—
"One McPhillipps"—
How I got home and how I found myself in the morning—
My mother's agony—
A day of teaching under difficulties—
Quiet again—
Law studies at Connersville—
"Out on a spree"—
What a spree means.

Law practice at Rushville—
Bright prospects—
The blight—
From bad to worse—
My mother's death—
My solemn promise to her—
"Broken, oh, God!"—
Reflection—
My remorse—
The memory of my mother—
A young man's duty—
Blessed are the pure in heart—
The grave—
Young man, murder not your mother—
Religion: a knife which is never red in blood.

Blank, black night—
Afloat—
From place to place—
No rest—
Struggles—
Giving way—
One gallon of whiskey in twenty-four hours—
Plowing corn—
Husking corn—
My object—
All in vain—
Old before my time—
A wild, oblivious journey—
Delirium tremens—
The horrors of here—
The dankness—
Heavenly hosts—
My release—
New tortures—
Insane wanderings—
In the woods—

At Mr. Hinchman's—
Frozen feet—
Drive to town in a buggy surrounded by devils—
Fears and sorrows—
No rest.

Wretchedness and degradation—
Clothes, credit, and reputation all lost—
The prodigal's return to his father's house—
Familiar scenes—
The beauty of nature—
My lack of feeling—
A wild horse—
I ride him to Raleigh and get drunk—
A mixture of vile poison—
My ride and fall—
The broken stirrups—
My father's search—
I get home once more—
Depart the same day on the wild horse—
Yearning for sympathy.

The ever-recurring spell—
Writing in the sand—
Hartford City—
In the Ditch—
Fairly started—
A telegram—
Sober—
A long night—
Ride home—
Palpitation of the heart—
Crawfordsville—
The inevitable—
No friends, money, nor clothes—
One hundred miles from home—
I take a walk—
Clinton County—
Engage to teach a school—
The lobbies of hell—
Arrested—
Flight to the country—
Open school—
A failure—
Return home—
The beginning of a terrible experience—
Two months of uninterrupted drinking—
Coatless, hatless, and, bootless—
The "Blue Goose"—
Inflammatory rheumatism—
The torments of religion—
Walking on crutches—
Drive to Rushville—
Another priest—
Pawn my clothes—
At Indianapolis—
A cold bath—
The consequence—
Teaching school—
Satisfaction given—
The kindness of his wife—
A paying practice at law.

The "Baxter Law"—
Its injustice—
Appetite controlled by legislation—
Indictments—
What they amount to—
"Not guilty"—
The Indianapolis police—
The Rushville grand jury—
Start home afoot—
Fear—
The coming head-light—
A desire to end my miserable existence—
"Now is the time"—
A struggle in which life wins—
Flight across the fields—
Bathing in dew—
Hiding from the officers—
My condition—
Prayer—
My unimaginable sufferings—
Advised to lecture—
The time I began to lecture.

My first lecture—
A cold and disagreeable evening—
A fair audience—
My success—
Lecture at Fairview—
The people turn out en masse—
At Rushville—
Dread of appearing before the audience—
Hesitation—
I go on stage and am greeted with applause—
My fright—
I throw off my father's old coat & stand forth—
Begin to speak, and soon warm to my subject—
I make a lecture tour—
Four hundred & seventy lectures in Indiana—
The aid of the good—
Opposition and falsehood—
Unkind criticism—
Tattle mongers—
My fall—
Attempt to commit suicide—
Inflict an ugly but not dangerous wound on myself—
Ask the sheriff to lock me in the jail.

Struggle for life—
A cry of warning—
"Why don't you quit?"—
Solitude, separation, banishment—
No quarter asked—
The rumseller is a priest—
A risk no man should incur—
The bloated druggist—
The three distinct properties of religion—
Ten days in Cincinnati—
The stick that turned to a serpent—
A world of devils—
Flying in dread—
My condition grows worse.

Recovery—
Trip to Maine—
Lecturing in that state—
The "Dare To Do Right" reformer—
Return to Indianapolis—
Lecturing—
Newspaper extracts—
The criticisms of the press—
Private letters of encouragement—
Friends dear to memory—
Sacred names.

At home again—
Overwork—
Shattered nerves—
Downward to hell—
Conceive the idea of traveling with someone—
Leave Indianapolis with General Macauley—
Separate from him at Buffalo—
I go on to New York alone—
Trading clothes for whiskey—
Delirious wanderings—
Thirteen years at the Corcoran—
Jersey City—
In the calaboose—
Deathly sick—
An insane neighbor—
Another—
In court—
"John Dalton"—
"Here! your honor"—
Discharged—
Boston—
Drunk—
At the residence of Junius Brutus Booth—
Lecturing again—
Home—
Converted—
Go to Boston—
Attend the Moody and Sankey meetings—
Get drunk—
Home once more—
Committed to the asylum—
Reflections—
The shadow which whispered "Go away!"

A sleepless night—
Try to write on the following day but fail—
My friends consult with the officers of the institution—
I am discharged—
Go to Indianapolis and get drunk—
My condition at present—
The end.

Research

2011-04-11T18:11:00.001-07:00

___________

Research

And soon the fragments dim of lovely forms

Come trembling back, unite…

S.T. Coleridge

A dragon circles a tortoise

Balancing four elephants on its shell

& the elephants carry the world

Creation begins as sound & light & color

& forms form an orb of consciousness

Drawing forth circlets around the source

Experience never follows a blueprint

Spokes from the central source move

Pavonine (of or like a peacock)

Listen to me please

Speak not in conflict

Demarcate an inside distinct from an outside

The potential before the totality

Has permeable contours

Confounding beginnings & ends

Life feeds itself

A single image

Begets & weds

Passing through all things

Cursive desires

Pillow books

The edge of the sea

Holds the world &

Contains the universe

Cash Rules Etc

2011-04-11T18:09:00.000-07:00

Even in a recession people still enjoy donuts

Business has been exactly the same through the years

We contribute donuts to myriad charitable organizations

When Krispy Kreme came to town everybody tried them

But they came back

We’re kind of like a landmark

We look almost exactly like Dunkin’ Donuts

The Donut Man in Myrtle Beach has nothing on us

We win customers over with our free donut hole surprise

Ignorant people drive by on their way to work

Our cruellers are the best cruellers in the world

Perfectly textured with the right amount of crunch and fluff

I can't help it

I immediately start thinking

Is a crueller more pastry than donut

Nobody really knows what a donut is

You’ll get plenty of experts chiming in

But nobody really knows what a donut is

My New Favorite Book

2011-03-22T21:31:00.000-07:00

__________________

PEOPLE,

Stay tuned for the video review. I'm gonna cue it up.

Rex Feral Rules!

OK, so, Rex Feral's book "How to Rip Off Your Drug Dealer" spoke to me on so many levels. I'm from Cincinnati, the Queen City, so I know about drugs and drug dealers. It made me think about all the times I was leaving a drug deal and thinking, "I just got ripped off." So this book was like turning the tables on that whole thing. Sometimes I think I have to stick around, like it's a social thing or something, and get high with my dealer (who is ripping me off and more often than not smoking/using my newly purchased drugs), just because it's the right thing to do. And I'm always thinking that he (it's always a he, except for two times) is thinking, "When is this idiot gonna leave?" But then if you pick up and roll straight out, sometimes that's not cool because the neighbors might think that it's a drug operation next door. But they already know that, so it's an extended bad-faith charade. Still I do it. Or rather, did it.

Before I should die I should write about a pot dealer, let's call him Jim, who was born without arms because of Thalidomide. Jim was a photographer, mostly sports, who used his feet like we use our hands, which is amazing when you're high. He lived in a fitted-out tool shed. It had a kitchen and a bathroom, but it was still a tool shed. On the same property was a Buckminster Fuller Geodesic Dome built to spec, which I never got to visit. To be honest, it was always kind of creepy pulling up to the place, which was adjacent to a large cave system frequented by spelunkers.

Which brings me around to the whole "spraying water to weigh down weed" scam. I don't think "Jim" weighed down his pot, but only because that was back in the 80s and early 90s before the practice became widespread. Or so I've heard. It means adding water to something. It's like they think we don't know that we don't know. Hello Dealers, We know you're spraying it down. It's so f obvious. We get ripped off, because it's like Ghostbusters, "Who you gonna call?" Nobody.

The genius of this book is obvious. I want to apply its principles to everyday life. I have a life coach now. His name is Michel de Certau and he was a Jesuit. He is currently deceased. Although he didn't write explicitly about spelunking or drug dealing, after reading his 2-volume "The Practice of Everyday Life" the connection is clear to me.

"How to Rip-Off a Drug Dealer" is a true bedside book, much better than A.S. Byatt's "Possession" in almost every way.

Stay tuned for the video review, which promises to be unhinged. You can also read the Amazon review here, an exact copy of this text.

_________________

Life Coaching

2011-03-22T16:18:00.001-07:00

_____________________

My Life Coach told me to stop hanging out with you.
No, not people like you, you specifically.
It’s true that My Life Coach doesn’t know you.
But My Life Coach knows all about the idea of you.

This knowledge emerged from life coaching.
Don’t ask me if you don’t already know.
It’s not my job to coach you about life coaching.
My Life Coach explicitly warned me about this.

Of course, you would like to know more about My Life Coach.
These particulars I couldn’t provide even if I wanted to.
I signed a contract forbidding this sort of thing.
I too would like to know more about My Life Coach.

My Life Coach told me to stop wearing underwear.
It’s a life coach thing, you wouldn’t understand.

_________________

2011-03-17T17:16:00.000-07:00

_________

WE ARE
STILL HERE
RESEARCHING
WE LOVE IT
STOP

____

Infernus

2011-03-01T16:20:00.000-08:00

________

For me it'll be the Infernus.
It's fast and it looks great.

Jetski.

I also like the Infernus best.
It's really fast and has good handling.

I'm going to say the Split-6 ATV,
The Amphicar.
The Split-6 also goes on water
(albeit ridiculously slow).

PCJ-600. There's a million of them
driving on Bayshore Avenue.

The Skimmer, you can fly around
and land on water or land,
and it doesn't handle too sensitively
like its brother, The Biplane.

Polaris V8 by a mile.
American Muscle.

The Infernus,
because it's so fast and cool.
Sabre Turbo also.

The Streetfighter,
but it’s hard to find.

From what I remember...
The yellow one with the stripes?
It looked like a muscle car?
Like a Pontiac or something.

Cheetah.
Stinger.

THE RHINO BECAUSE IF YOU TURN THE TURRET BEHIND
YOU YOU CAN SHOOT AND THAT ADDS SPEED
AND IF YOU ARE RUNNING FROM COPS IT BLOWS THEM UP
AND ANY CAR THAT HITS YOU EXPLODES.

Infernus.

The Cuban Hermes
with its refreshed look.

So Infernus, Cheetah, Hunter, PCJ-600, Maverick,
Jetski, and the Gang Rancher. The Quad is also nice.
The Cuban Hermes. Polaris V-8. Stinger. Streetfighter.

The Rhino actually is pretty bad,
it doesn’t even have a proper engine sound.
It's like driving a silent tank.
It's also too easy to obtain.

Not what you think it is, something else

2011-02-20T21:14:00.000-08:00

_______________

demonstrations
phone number/your girlfriend
herringbone/cocaine
television/Willard Scott
etc

let’s move forward
many have long before

think about it
get back with me tomorrow

it’s not deep
it’s right on the surface
the surface is so small

more demonstrations
Argentina/sandgrass
bowl/this bowl
history/envelopes
etc

more demonstrations
butter/I can’t believe it’s not butter
dream/basketball
panda/pandacide
etc

_____

OP

2011-01-27T08:14:00.000-08:00

_____________________

obduracy of mind
over
page of desolation

object of contempt
over
pageant of life

obligation of loyalty
over
pang of regret

obliquity of vision
over
parade of erudition

obscurity of twilight
over
passion of patriotism

ocean of eloquence
over
passivity of mind

omission of fact
over
pattern of virtue

onrush of life
over
peals of laughter

onsets of temptation
over
pendulum of opinion

openness of mind
over
pensiveness of feeling

opulence of detail
over
perils of fortune

orgy of lying
over
period of lassitude

ornaments of eloquence
over
perturbation of mind

outbreak of hostilities
over
perversity of chance

outburst of tears
over
pests of society

outflow of sympathy
over
petrifaction of egoism

outposts of morality
over
phantom of delight

overflow of vitality
over
phase of belief

Call me Bye

2010-03-03T04:23:00.000-08:00

hey it's me group
our office tried to get
to see about with
its ticket
so it sounds like
so she was
but you know
when you get it going

hi if you can fax
yes hey missing you
your new book
I don't mean now
a good day this is

hi I know you're not
his take on exist but
I wish you were
because right now
my sort of boyfriend
Irene if you could come
over and helping
your thing out
so yeah give me a call

hi it's me again
this message sends you
know so you know
I'm not on my way
I just want to come over
as if all cellphone
I was going on bye

hi it's me
I'm just getting on
the messed up
when I totally forgot
so I'll just have some
place else If you get
out of town and why
estimates over
get something eat done
you know I said that
I will call you good day
so I was doing
you are and so
if you get this
give me a call back
already have you know
that but I'll call you
when I get out
on the other end soon
okay bye okay thanks

hey it's me almost 3
So if you were right
the laundromat
are you have that
and I'd love to serve
meetings so I thought
and I want to try your house
and I don't need to know
concerned something
comes in on Thursday
I was just
but in the gym
if you wanted
maybe you could
give me a parent
specifics in there
so to be put back in
it's your mother
are you still alive
call me bye

________

2010-02-16T20:08:00.000-08:00

Heavens Wideness in Mercy

Morning has spousal conflict
And now O Father mindful love
Were you there my guardian drop drop
Slow tears at the lamb’s high feast
Servant choirs new name days
Ended O hearts saints are one
Mercy consolation cross glory
To the name that brings salvation
I wake I turn to you O friends
For ever love

Creator of the stars of night
Comes with clouds descending
Impious I love the green blade
The saint who first found grace to pen
Told out loving all hopefulness
Planted day hath made sweet
Just as I am without one plea
How sweet the name of sounds
The golden kindly light abode
Celestial word we look to thee
O my for you I long O

The national anthem love divine
All creatures weep weep no longer
royal banners forward go noblest cities
Merry O faithful life hallowed chosen
Morn of heads mighty gates
Open volume stands stars morning
Days and day the first of days made
Our choirs new anthems raise
Heart begotten

Once in royal life divine
Brightly shines message
One foundation in my/your/our head
Hail the festival day
On this day the first of days
The ceaseless round
Who came from above
Breathes on me
Breath of a thousand tongues
I bind unto myself today

Throned in splendour O come
O come sing word come down to earth
Come raise the anthem
Brightest and best of the morning
Life is done O word of above
Immortal love for ever full
Hand O guided we share a mystic grave
Beyond all mortal praise
Good above all other
We have a gospel to proclaim

Ever singing it is finished
Consolation seeks a comfort sure
Long ago prophets knew mysteries
Of the glorious body telling
We show forth here
We plough the fields
Before the ending of perfect love
Let us join our cheerful songs
Bright the vision that delighted

Sunday collect earth and sea
Collect O glorious maid
The sure foundation is here
Collect O dedication festival
Joy and triumph everlasting
Glory safe kept glory my night
Sun of my soul come thankful people
How broad and far bells peal forth
Mercy pity peace and love
I sing my salvation as the hart

From the eastern mountains
Joyful walking in a garden ever dwelling
Around the throne of witness palms
(O give thanks) All things bright & beautiful
Draw nigh and take the body
Let all mortal flesh keep silence
Enthroned in heavenly splendor
Presence sweet endureth pants
The hart for cooling streams
(Show me your ways)
Still throned in heaven
A land of pure delight and sorrow
Working outcome on bended knee

Survey the wondrous cross O
Sacred sore wounded day draws
Up on high strong to save
These eyes have never seen
Sinless came sure foundation
Who shall sit forth for service
Not friend O the same as now
The sun’s declining rays be with me
Creator of the light highest holiest
Saints on earth
Through all the changing scenes

Morning gilds the skies
O heaven and earth stand up
The growing limbs strong
Son of eternal love
How bright these glorious spirits shine
Harbinger of morn
O word immortal O king
O let the heart beat high
Bread of the world watchers
My soul there is a country
Golden splendor of the north
Clothed in the very thought
Heavens wideness in mercy

________

2010-01-30T07:14:00.000-08:00

Hello Michelle

Such a continuous anonymously scroll transition for the open book. Loads of exactly the same one of the closed book. Opens arise from the fact that the book can be considered me. They're playing. We have container not quite simply has contacted if I'm not objected to be put away shelf replaced on the table but now there is at the print packs. Fontana spaces specials from one of the other girls reside in tension between the two, this is attention provoke side and stop maintaining and throughout its patience but also relax is in the pizza interested to some volume hope to the type of repositories.

Hesitantly the factor plate of compose boxes unrelated to the circumstances. He was one of the very first among us to make books this character as written composition to really failed tomorrow to number of ways. He stage the writing competition as well as everything by slave charge with touching the Bowen from the library. I don't know perfectly well that the idea cannot do without account Delivery, Good wishes to be exposed unfolded. It must take on the bearing the pictures that in for that must allow the turning twists controllers in two towers of. Barrington printed the idea. Requires its character.

As a matter of principle. The book is eligible calls for commands reading the name of that there was a little bit. It was Jill Dougherty hitting on a question of what is too badly from cross-dialed scribbled eligible for a remains closed. In the opening of the book. Hope slips from page 2. Page remains calm clued stitched into binding roast laborious good time. Just wanted to know you have time to trip over the secret again. Trying to buck was alleged those not parading and all the only by starting from it or something. Then the offer. Talk to reading.

_______

2009-11-12T21:33:00.000-08:00

Mys

reading I think I want to be am being not becoming I mean a miniature serpentine unrolling a scroll not turning the page and a line left to right top to bottom off to on a reading clean jiggling

an awkward pursuit never turning pages again a page to turn again never restlessly restively words in freedom change always inevitable shortcomings the time good men and women come to the aid of their party the carrier pigeon learns just as we learn flying by history sensing the new tomorrow announced yesterday when we were asleep books in our laps dreams ready to spring already forgotten upon dreams ready to spring not yet forgotten always forgotten but never quite not a story, narrative, lyric effusion cognition unaware unspoken & unwritten in sounds

& alphabets faked by tradition hidden masked potential ruses all the more potential hidden never to be known still we keep going as if we had a choice keeping going dreaming the solace of the pause trapped in this dreaming the solace of the interlude draining pages of ink draining in the gutter to your lap as you hold the book that book in your lap & you expect the ink to be ink forever on the page flashing out to your memory of that day that felt real it isn’t, it isn’t that that’s why I’m doin’ I know what I’m doin they wanted a new regime and my regime includes East coast includes West coast just don’t feed into it you know what I’m saying I know about the truth I’m Frank White I know what people write and read about the truth I’m not Frank White I don’t know anything about truth I am not a famous hotelier hanging here, just hanging a body is a voice is and is not a voice or a body is writing is a gerund not a noun Charles Bernstein taught me this art is a gerund not a noun writing is a noun art is a noun nothing has ever been obvious Mike Corcoran taught me this in Pittsburgh I’ve never been to Pittsburgh the three rivers but I’ve read about it actually I have been to Pittsburgh you know what I’m talking about raw hitting & hybrid living open wheel racing breaking aways excepting & accepting the nature of things signs taken for wonders lavish absences once more say when back long ago clarity is a secondary grace I couldn’t have put it better mys

2009-10-20T20:33:00.000-07:00

________

Zenith

brooks grown audible
allurements of a coquette
splendor of the summer day
implacable approach of doom
blood burned in his face
babbledom dogs the heels of fame
the look of a father
touched with a lazy fragrance
hidden flowers
spiritual conflict tore his heart
mist came down and hid the land
smile of languor
air and sky belonged to midsummer
clouded restless jaded
the balm of solitary musing
clamorous agitation of rebellious passions
blandishments of pleasure and pomp of power
chivalrous homage of respect
the chaotic sound of the sea
caressed with song
fugitive strains of old
bound of the pulse of spring
chill of night crept in from the street
bait proved successful
afternoons filled with sound and sunshine
caressing peace of bright soft sunshine
the air darkened swiftly
accelerated beat of his thoughts
constant iteration of the sea's wail
afternoon was waning
beauty straightway vanished
chivalric sentiments of honor
conversation became desultory
a touch of pathos
his ideas flowed full and strong
whizzed on with cumulative fury
singing at the door
sang itself into evening
at once redolent and vociferous
blind with fog
gracious
in a stately procession
when you dared to dream
debilitating fears of alluring fate
solemn purple of the summer night
flush ebbed out of his face
tranquillity of the shaded solitude
deepening twilight shadowy vision
the wants and aspirations of his soul
reproof of imagined distrust
of an unworthy alliance
the sealed eye and soul
of indescribable afterthoughts
beautiful in the tender glow of the evening
day tinged blue mistiness
earth despoiled
alone frowned clouds
grace of an unpremeditated agreeable talker
easy-going indolence of a sedentary life
a wrathful roar surged and boomed among the hills
solemn and sharp out of the green-gold air
enchanting days of youth
evening comes with slow steps
silvery and solitary on the girdle of the early night
exaggerations of morbid hallucinations
excitement of rival issues
wistful looks of innocence and simplicity
scrutinizing observer
eyes burnt with an amazing fire
eyes filled with playfulness and vivacity
a father's vigil of questioning sorrow
recoil from disillusionment
flawless triumphs of art
flight of the autumnal days
flowers of courtesy
fluttering of untried wings
fragrance of a dear and honored name
the breeze struck his brow with a cooling hand
freshness of some pulse of air from an invisible sea
fruit of vast and heroic labors
extraordinary lavish profusion
the give and take was delicious
the afternoon deepened
winter dwelt on everything
insolence of self-conceit
glow of the ambitious fire
the past and the bright-hued hope of the future
golden riot of the autumn leaves
gray air rang and rippled with lark music
caperings of buffoonery
grotesque nightmare of a haunting fear
time sweeps them into oblivion
melody of some familiar line of verse
a haunting phrase leaped to my brain
headlong vigor of sheer improvisation
heights of magnanimity and love
the hills were clad in rose and amethyst
the hill-tops gleam in morning's spring
the sweetness of the challenge
the hot humiliation of it
curiosity of the mind
idiosyncratic peculiarities of thought
chatter of the crowd
tyranny of a present emotion
incarnation of all loveliness
loquacity of a nervous patient
an indefinable air of good-brooding
indefinable yearning for days that were dead
indefinite atmospheres of an opulent nature
glances of wondering eyes
intrusive question faded
stigma of selfishness
the iron hand of oppression
this is the past and the uncertain future
the landscape ran laughing downhill to the sea
leaden skies rest heavily on the earth
leaves of time drop stealthily
syllabled her name in cautious whispers
lights winked
the lofty grace of a prince
loud and urgent pageantry of the day
low hills on the horizon wore a haze of living blue
machinations of an unscrupulous enemy
magical lights of the horizon
solemnity of the moment yielded to warmth of day
beauty of womanhood
melodies of birds and bees
memory grew fantastic and remote
meticulous observation of facts notwithstanding
the mind freezes at the thought
that the moment marked an epoch
more's the pity
morning beckons
droning along peacefully
the most servile acquiescence
odors competing for your attention
soft winds in the tree-tops
the surf boomed in melancholy mockery
murmuring of summer seas
the music and mystery of the sea
her delicious voice
singing a swift melody in his blood
unforgotten years sounded again in his soul
mute melancholy landscape
mystery obsessed him
nameless and inexpressible fascination of midnight music
full of the brooding power of one universal spirit
nascent spirit of chivalry
night was drowned in stars
old ruddy conviction deserted me
the vividness of life
opulent sunsets
the orange pomp of the setting sun
oscillations of human genius
pageantry of sea and sky
the palest abstractions of thought
palpitating silence lengthened
the panorama of life unrolled before him
paraphernalia of power and prosperity
the crimson glory of the ripening summer sun
slowly drifted out of his thought
the pendulous eyelids of old age
his memory something unforgettable
pent-up intolerance of years of repression
saturated the night with wild fragrance
the pageant of life
pith and sinew of maturity
the prestige of disaster in the air
preternatural pomposities
pulpits pristine freshness
the rebounding sea
purging sunlight of clear poetry
vaulted night
irresistibly emerged
quick pulse of gain
radiant serenity of the sky
stainless fields of snow
retreating splendor
the river ran darkly
sang with its lips to the pebbles
traffic rose to thunder
ardor of a generous mind
a solemn and awful quietude
widening off into the distance
twilight of boyhood
arrogance of youth
deepened inexplicably
scars of rancor and remorse
thornless roses stole in
heaved silvery
under a haze of winter sun
the sea-sweep enfolds
satisfying eye and mind
the sea-wind their faces
secret and subduing
charm of the woods
see-saw of a wavering courage
sentimental tourists tempted to tarry
shadows of the night retreat
the weight of unbearable loneliness
shivers of the dusk
fragrantly down the valley
silent days perfumed hidden flowers
silver silence of the night
sinking sun made mellow gold of all the air
and grew brighter with the imminent day
grew ensaffroned with an indescribable hue
sky put on the panoply of evening
sky relentless
changeless blue
sky dull and brooding
sky heavily sprinkled with stars
sky turning to the pearly gray of dawn
smiling incarnation of loveliness
the sound of the sea waxed
the steadfast mind kept its hope
the steady thunder of the sea accented the silence
still voice of the poet
forced composure
the star-hung night
thought shimmered through her
the stream forgot to smile
the discord seemed to mock his mood
other influences seemed to arrest and chill
the rush of the awakened mind
summit of human attainment
blazed torridly
down in flame on the far horizon
golden-soft over the huddled hills
spread at a gallop along the hillside
rushing to its height
daylight of an olive garden
tender grace of a day that is fled
tension of struggling tears which strove for an outlet
the thought leaped
a timely effusion of tearful sentiment
betrayed a curious irritation
torture of love and terror crushed
trees rustled and whispered
streams tumult subsided
her mind found sudden speech
pride and pleasure
moving feet in the lamplit city
nipping winds and early frosts
glorious gray eyes
vacant fields blankly irresponsive
the shadowy stream of time
the pulsation and throbbing of intellect
appeared a source of peril
the vision fled him
in a touch of humor
the web is rent in pieces
in the same desolate grove
foliage
nameless regret
winds flew round sobbing
panting towards the downs
piping drearily
in high frolic with the rain
the winnowed taste of the ages
silent with adoration
the youth of the soul
the zenith turned shell pink

________

2009-10-15T22:38:00.000-07:00

Letter

Poor fishermen

& other wonder voyagers

Neo Neo- Classicism

An ongoing project

Justified sinners

Counter cultures

Outdoor installations

Inscription rooms

Art in nature

Prospect 89

In the midst of things

Inscape pencil buds

Playing for real toys

Young meteors

Turning over the pages

A memory

Without day

Writing aloud

The sonnet as a sewing machine

Nature over again after

Selected ponds

Honey by the water

Unnatural pebbles

A wartime garden

Invented names for real people

Detached sentences on weather

A mast of hankies

A harbor of boat

All that glisters
The war of the letter

________

2009-10-15T22:18:00.000-07:00

Rehabilitation Bulletin

cutting timber into boards of equal measure

in a land clearance operation unheard of before

recording accomplishments of extreme dignity

for under-employed adults & restive youth

making their bedrolls tighter & tighter

shining their shoes shinier & shinier

entering the theater they act like characters

in a Restoration comedy of unimaginable tedium

when we go through these kinds of obligations

we need all the help & comfort

you can give so please do give generously

if not for us for elimination & evacuation

engaging in reforestation of denuded hillsides

straddling the slidelines

gathering seeds sloping planting

lining an irrigation canal slanting

fastening a telegraph wire to a glass insulator

atop a telegraph pole in a national forest

the establishment of anti-terror harm schools

& the storage & distribution of respirators

recollections of the wars between the states

& administrative problems of nautical institutes

what to do & what not to do in an air raid drill

dreaming of disaster desiring of disaster

protective concealment in the second person

in office buildings everywhere morale mobilization

allocations & priorities language breaking free

economic organization in total war the third person

control systems for larger communities

& also for smaller communities god bless them

shelter divisions & wings for everyone

abbreviations & alphabetics

under bombardment for domestic typhoons

recreation programs vital links in management

atomic powder under arms the first person

peaceful soldiers & civilian barbers

resistance as national defense

non-violent action against aggression

casualty & social welfare

salary earning aphorisms

exemplary productivity

service station specialists

against the police idea always

multiyear contracting of space stations

& the fortunes to be made there

waiting out temporal hostilities

unconquerable potential

of deterrence & defense

properly understood

state estate planning

of radioactive waste

witnessing the lease

situations & innovations

simplifications & indoctrinations

a post-military solution for the new era

farce estimates of annual averages

devastation & abuses by all parties

strategic approaches to satellite remote sensing

industrial plot retention

responsible tourism & butterfly tagging

unit randomness not adversely affected

radically redirected right now

future considerations might be

the eyes of the land of the morning

of meadows woodlands & forests

poignant memories of sunshine & shadows

rain night the architecture of occupation

working always between the words

different levels different roles

________

2009-10-15T22:13:00.001-07:00

Always Once More

once more say you are the country

take almost any path you please

& ten to one you’re down a dale

& left there by a pool and stream

there stand trees

each a hollow trunk

there sleeps meadow

& there sleep cattle

up from yonder cottage

goes a sleepy sympathy

deep woodlands mazy ways

the scent of a symphony bathed blue

but though thus tranced

as by a cataract of sand

would you travel there

why upon your voyage as a passenger

did you feel such a charge

when told that you and your boat

were now out to sea

why do the old hold the sea holy

ungraspable phantom vapors

both of us pull & pass

buttered & salted & peppered

you grow hazy about the eyes

& press yourself to the research

you grow quarrelsome

after four hours of sleep

Balzac Zola & Proust tease you

no never go as a passenger

false cognates close parallels

the same lot as usual

Esperanto coffee & drugs

always once more say repeat

________

Decorative Value

2009-10-15T22:07:00.000-07:00

instinctive seriousness

material abode

coy retired

thought or reverie

the red rose came first

said a quaint German mystic

beige things

real things

quite blank forgetfulness

passed in continuous dreaming

two generations before

the somber expression

inmates fanciful

an elegant diversion

the care of flocks

vulgarity seemed impossible

struggling family pride

elegant gentleman farming

immemorial authority

leaping through heaps of blazing straw

the meaning and consequences

a sustained freshness of regret

languid and shadowy enough

delicately carved marble house

the richest flowers from the garden

sincerely touched and awed

the presence of their images

devout circumspection

the world of men and things

the velvet of the mosses

the marble plates slipped from their places

the play of the sea-wind

the decorative value of the floor

________

Never Mind the Turtle

2009-10-15T22:05:00.000-07:00

Never mind the turtle.

Don’t you think you’re sure to win?

You’re in the grocery store with a broken cart.

How will you ever be that hungry?

Your tongue is now a magnet.

Whatever will you use for silverware?

You can punch a hole through an apple with a straw.

How do you think that makes your milkshake feel?

You’ve got to make contact with the alien leader.

How will you tell when the conversation is finished?

You’re wearing a sweater that stretches to your feet.

What color belt do you put on?

You’ve been entered in a shadow puppet contest.

What’s your best pose?

________

Mind Anything

2009-10-13T19:54:00.000-07:00

Mind anything others felt war

The police car kept full making unlearning

& neither held the report’s interest once

You person together with the main services

Using health a sure white million

Words of the child prime minister including

Several Society of Jesuit brothers who seemed kind

Behind themselves wanted economic love

Means upon areas effect likely English

City therefore woman real position

Center South England community view

Gave hard job among staff

Read process line future particular

Provide present became taking international

Study moment run special result

Action difficult pay particularly sense

Age order management idea certain

North light play sort west

Evidence try close experience rather

Land third seems believe morning

Outside turn else free meeting

Leave cost church death sometimes

Thus training range move coming

Brought getting European ten matter

Shall heard table needs late

Ago century course street human

United gone yesterday call lost

Ask word groups along central

History few usually changes remember

Hundred individual air program rate

Building food hands committee

Team hours indeed language

Someone everything short certainly trying

Based section saying lot price

Similar reason single minutes authority

Town cases common true role

Data subject Europe class nature

Necessary states bank value companies

Simply especially hope department east

Personal figure union total cut

Member near started private paper

Seven patients UK type eight

Live systems French herself practice

Wife low seem talk former

Increase friend decision countries expected

Terms makes earlier return financial

Quality concerned higher date foreign

Approach rest ground strong wrong

Living march situation comes provided

Soon bed account offer recent

Various understand bad schools weeks

Bring greater conditions amount results

Added clearly paid field costs project

Forward include stop tried decided

Red poor award front hospital

Friends shown music month game

Summer Idleness

2009-10-11T03:33:00.000-07:00

ten thousand resultant combinations

from the heliconian muses

let us begin to sing

the first religion

soft feet deep blue spring

triumph of the old country

washed tender bodies

advance to the church

veiled in mist thick

powder all the pots inside

the military escort

delights in arrows

after the last donkey

hope in the middle of despair

on the slopes of your son's wife

a pile of cocaine

delicious recoil

from the flood of water in summer heat

phospherus lime and delicate fibers

the crown of gold

habits merely an order

a shoot of sturdy laurel

the wood-ash covers cuddle

studs the table and the pony

submit to the hearth child

& quickly bring the golden shoes

worthiest gods perfect and young

the swallow that perches light-footed

harmony of the temple spectacle

the loud thunderer glad

to maintain this ecstasy

violets from the grave

hunters of deep sea prey,

have we caught anything?

all that we caught we left behind,

& all that we did not catch we carry home

the homes of the immortals

inward world of thought and feeling

movements of the shore side

some trick of magic

dwarved into the narrowest chamber

a group of impressions

walls of personality

a solitary prisoner in perpetual flight

single moments apprehended

relics more or less fleeting

vanishing away unweaving

all melts under our feet

the roughness of the eye

exquisite passions

sleeping before evening

in the hydrogen chamber

tell me of my cattle

in warlike harnesses

the truth of the old world

more desirable

restoration and retention

still they survived

every ray of sound

rusts iron and ripens corn

the fashion

the main a matter

the young right power

of the able-footed mule

feeling roman

spot lightning in the field

a place of sacred circumstance

a place almost stifling

gratitude to the single family

and the day of the little

private celebrations

purifications in the vineyard

the victims of the northern style

and the Latin liturgy

the procession moved on its way

though its precise meaning was long

filling large baskets

busy in the great portico

the girls of the farm

the painted chest in the hall

family records spacious and quaint

law and its entaglements

the splendor of our experience

rearranging the details

we have an interval

quickened & multiplied

and then we have no more

gods yet more mysterious

the instuments of labor lie untouched

branches of apple and cherry

in spacious bloom

clean full incense

altars more sumptuous than the old garden

the young scent

the monotonous cloud

the procession moved in absolute stillness

a pontifical formula

the ceremonies of the day

the chief points of domestic conduct

and much speculative activity

the stirring wind passing

the placid heads

the blessing of the fields

the research council

everyday in the marketplace

the rabbit whaler

details of the ceremonial

names of the no longer sacred

the morsel of honeycomb

a few violets

a cake dipped in wine

the family meal the second course

southern style

dizzy on brandy and failure

night stillness

veils of familiarity

the mirth of the evening complete

the servants at supper

in the great kitchen

the imperfect light sober

the beating of violent rain

solitude and nearness

a sort of protection

from the order of a birthday

the material abode

the red rose came first

the doubles or seconds of real things

quite blank forgetfulness

the unconsecrated host

culture of the olive and vine

the same analogy

passed in continuous dreaming

daytime extravagance

of spent substance

nearer to the dwelling-house

not without its picturesque charm

the north american land mass

young intimates of the national

cultivation of the primitive

ideal dignity of nature itself

the charm of exclusiveness

still sung

summer was not discouraged

young feelings in the richest garden

the living welcomed

the ways of sentiment

and the present whole and severe

the demands and claims of others

the early end of travelling

the sloped faces of white roads

the marsh-land below

pale red beyond the gates

playing velvet in the sea-wind

mosses on ledges and angles

marble plates slipped delicate

gracefull wildness

the decorative value of the floor

that head of Medusa

the coast of the thing

and the whitest pigeons

the sands of a fisherman's net

little glazed windows

the purple distant harbor

white breakers long-drawn curves

the peculiar sanctuary

of the shadowy people

desiring sleep and soft lines

the many folds of the veil

the pleasures of winter

the very dead warm

of generous heat

the sufferings of the animal world

and the soft lines of hands and face

the sense of some unexplored evil

the snakes breeding happily

the incident made food distasteful

and sleep uneasy

memory corners of reptiles

the lower side of the world

secret of no particular dread

a sluggish viper

childhood traditions of the past

peculiar influences never outgrown

the sense of distraction everywhere

the country and the open air

the ramble to the coast

the marsh with its dwarf roses

wild lavender

delightful signs

abandoned boats

the ruined flood-gates

the flock of wild birds

vague scents and sounds

the grave northern notes

summer idleness

_________

Hegel Remarks Somewhere

2009-10-11T03:16:00.000-07:00

men make their own history

they forget their native tongue

we think about these salient differences

they reveal themselves

cut off the feudal heads

parceled-out land properly used

sober reality bred its own true interpreters

its real military leaders sat behind the office desk

ghosts watched over its cradle

classical traditions of the Roman Republic

ideals and the art forms the self-deceptions

on the high plane of great historic tragedy

new struggles not making ghosts walk again

Republicans in yellow gloves

the iron death mask of Napoleon

accelerated power of motion

old chronology old names old edicts

a subject of antiquarian scholarship

a pale lamp fastened to his head

at the exits a confused welter

the social revolution of the nineteenth century

cannot take its poetry from the past

but only from the future

let the dead bury their dead

________

The 19th Century English Novel

2009-10-09T15:11:00.000-07:00

1.
throws round a measuring eye
assents in precisely the right terms
treads the primrose path of dalliance
bandies adjectives with the best
uses unguarded adjectives
challenges his dissent
aware of emotion
cherishes petty resentments
born to a lively and intelligent lyricism
does her best to mask her agitation

2.
curls her fastidious lip
dimly mistrustful
curls her lip with defiant scorn
discreetly silent
falls into a dreamy silence
empty of thought
falls into abstracted reverie
entangled in a paradox
carried off by a rush of incoherent impressions
gives his youth away by handfuls

3.
airily lampoons her most treasured prejudices
an air of restrained fury
bows submission
nods mutely
braces himself to the exquisite burden of life
nourishes a dream of ambition
intimates speech with her
frowns incomprehension
draws near to a desperate resolve
forces a faint quivering smile

4.
pours on him the full opulence of a proud recognition
evinces his displeasure by a contemptuous sneer
shakes hands grudgingly
feels an unaccountable loathing
regards him stonily out of flint-blue eyes
detects the hollow ring of fundamental nothingness
sits eyeing him with frosty calm
feels the ironic rebound of her words
recaptures herself with difficulty
could do absolutely naught

5.
flung diffidence to the winds
demure and dimly appealing
most profoundly skeptical
gripped with a sense of suffocation and panic
nothing if not grandiloquent
stricken to the soul
writhed in the grip of a definite apprehension
oppressed by a dead melancholy
mused a little while in grave thought
stilled and trampled on the inward protest

6.
twitted him merrily
flushed crimson
strangled a fierce tide of feeling that welled up within her
found the silence intolerably irksome
wore an air of wistful questioning
frowned perplexedly
stood her ground with the most perfect dignity
gave her a baffled stare
spoke with hurried eagerness
smiled with fatuous superiority

7.
suppressed every sign of surprise
both weary and placated
gave himself to a sudden day-dream
an anguish of sharp and penetrating remorse
murmured a civil rejoinder
an undercurrent of acidity
listened greedily and gazed intently
softened her frown to a quivering smile
paused stunned and uncomprehending
permitted herself a delicate little smile

8.
hugged the thought of her unknown and unapplauded integrity
sat on thorns
questioned inimically
raised a silencing hand
seemed the embodiment of dauntless resolution
haunted and begirt by presences
spoke with sweet severity
submitted in brooding silence
swept away all opposing opinion
sighed deeply from a kind of mental depletion

________

The Trigger

2009-09-30T22:02:00.001-07:00

First second

Nephew uncle

Same circumstances

Second Past

Tradition brains &

Living Spirits

I am the smallest ant

Self-expression

I take as a given

What is a self

Whatever this

Past masks

Apostle revolution

Guise of a Roman revolution

The beginner’s tongue new

Old tasks

Feudal springs anew

Other only

Unfettered nations

Imagined communities

The resurrected tribunes

Of office protections

Austere ghosts

Self deceptions

Passion planes

The dead of world history

Us & them

Yes, you & me

Street justice

Stage speech awakening

Dead porpoises

Given imagination

Mad old hard pale

I am still here

Lamp fastened on head

The long whips whelter

No common language

Overseers

Exit forced

Memory perils

Syrup answers

Old old middle

Social past

Future past

Former dead phrase

February’s old people

Liberal state swords

Answer interval studies

Latter surface

Situational Aesthetics

Cruel thoroughness

Half-measures first-attempts

Blue thunder platforms

Civil spells

Overthrowing the prologue

Spell moment eyes name

Elemental dynastic circles

Politically possessing exclusive

Actual people barricades

General modern material

Claims remaining

Old whole vision wide

Barricade foundations

I am still here

Reacting to the public

For the entire cycle

Endless generation

Until the shop closes

The shop will close

Etc

Barricades in one form

In the sky

Forever

More words

The trigger

________

Tropics of Exchange

I Save All Old Wallets

At Mr. Hinchman's

Research

Cash Rules Etc

My New Favorite Book

Life Coaching

Telegram

Infernus

Not what you think it is, something else

OP

Call me Bye

Decorative Value

Never Mind the Turtle

Mind Anything

Summer Idleness

Hegel Remarks Somewhere

The 19th Century English Novel

The Trigger