Early shadows—
An unmerciful enemy—
The miseries of the curse—
Sorrow and gloom—
What religion robs man of—
What it does—
What it does not do—
Surrounding evils—
Blighted homes—
A Titan devil—
The utterness of the destroyer—
A truthful narrative—
"Stingeth like an adder."
Birth, parentage and early education—
Early childhood—
Memories vivid—
Bitter desolation—
An active but uneasy life—
Breaking colts for amusement—
Amount of sleep—
Temperament has much to do in the matter—
The author to blame for his misspent life—
Inheritances—
The excellences of my father and mother—
The road to ruin not willfully trodden—
The people's indifference to a great danger—
My associates—
What became of them—
The customs of twenty years ago—
What might have been.
The old log school house—
My studies and discontent—
My first drink of liquor—
The companion of my first debauch—
One drink always brings the next—
Religion is a horrible slavery—
A horseback ride on Sunday—
Raleigh—
Return home—
"Dead drunk"—
My parents' shame and sorrow—
My own remorse—
An unhappy and silent breakfast—
The anguish of my mother—
Gradual recovery—
Resolves and promises—
No pleasure in religion—
Hopelessness of the believers' condition—
The resistless power of appetite—
Possible escape—
The courage required—
The three laws—
Their violation and man's atonement.
School days at Fairview—
My first public outbreak—
A schoolmate—
Drive to Falmouth—
First drink at Falmouth—
Disappointment—
Drive to Smelser's Mills—
My opinion of patent medicines—
Boasting—
More liquor—
Difficulty in lighting a cigar—
A hound that got in bad company—
Oysters at Falmouth—
& what befell us while waiting for them—
Drunken slumber—
A hound in a crib—
Getting awake—
The owner of the hound—
Sobriety—
The Vienna jug—
Another debauch—
The exhibition—
The end of the school term—
Starting to college at Cincinnati—
My companions—
The destruction wrought by companions.
A warning—
A dangerous fallacy—
Byron's inspiration—
Lord Brougham—
Sheridan—
Sue—
Swinburne—
Dr. Carpenter's opinion—
An erroneous idea—
The best aid to thought.
Quit college—
Shattered nerves—
Summer and autumn days—
Improvement—
Picnic parties—
A fall—
An untimely storm—
Crawford's beer and ale—
Beer brawls—
County fairs and their influence on my life—
My yoke of white oxen—
The "red ribbon"—
"One McPhillipps"—
How I got home in the morning—
My mother's agony—
A day of teaching under difficulties—
Quiet again—
Law studies at Connersville—
"Out on a spree"—
What a spree means.
Law practice at Rushville—
Bright prospects—
The blight—
From bad to worse—
My mother's death—
My solemn promise to her—
"Broken, oh, God!"—
Reflection—
My remorse—
The memory of my mother—
A young man's duty—
Blessed are the pure in heart—
The grave—
Young man, murder not your mother—
Religion: a knife which is never red in blood.
Blank, black night—
Afloat—
From place to place—
No rest—
Struggles—
Giving way—
One gallon of whiskey in twenty-four hours—
Plowing corn—
Husking corn—
My object—
All in vain—
Old before my time—
A wild, oblivious journey—
Delirium tremens—
The horrors of here—
The dankness—
Heavenly hosts—
My release—
New tortures—
Insane wanderings—
In the woods—
Drunken slumber—
A hound in a crib—
Getting awake—
The owner of the hound—
Sobriety—
The Vienna jug—
Another debauch—
The exhibition—
The end of the school term—
Starting to college at Cincinnati—
My companions—
The destruction wrought by companions.
A warning—
A dangerous fallacy—
Byron's inspiration—
Lord Brougham—
Sheridan—
Sue—
Swinburne—
Dr. Carpenter's opinion—
An erroneous idea—
The best aid to thought.
Quit college—
Shattered nerves—
Summer and autumn days—
Improvement—
Picnic parties—
A fall—
An untimely storm—
Crawford's beer and ale—
Beer brawls—
County fairs and their influence on my life—
My yoke of white oxen—
The "red ribbon"—
"One McPhillipps"—
How I got home in the morning—
My mother's agony—
A day of teaching under difficulties—
Quiet again—
Law studies at Connersville—
"Out on a spree"—
What a spree means.
Law practice at Rushville—
Bright prospects—
The blight—
From bad to worse—
My mother's death—
My solemn promise to her—
"Broken, oh, God!"—
Reflection—
My remorse—
The memory of my mother—
A young man's duty—
Blessed are the pure in heart—
The grave—
Young man, murder not your mother—
Religion: a knife which is never red in blood.
Blank, black night—
Afloat—
From place to place—
No rest—
Struggles—
Giving way—
One gallon of whiskey in twenty-four hours—
Plowing corn—
Husking corn—
My object—
All in vain—
Old before my time—
A wild, oblivious journey—
Delirium tremens—
The horrors of here—
The dankness—
Heavenly hosts—
My release—
New tortures—
Insane wanderings—
In the woods—
At Mr. Hinchman's—
Frozen feet—
Riding in a buggy surrounded by devils—
Fears and sorrows—
No rest.
Wretchedness and degradation—
Clothes, credit, and reputation all lost—
The prodigal's return to his father's house—
Familiar scenes—
The beauty of nature—
My lack of feeling—
A wild horse—
I ride him to Raleigh and get drunk—
A mixture of vile poison—
My ride and fall—
The broken stirrups—
My father's search—
I get home once more—
Depart the same day on the wild horse—
Yearning for sympathy.
The ever-recurring spell—
Writing in the sand—
Hartford City—
In the Ditch—
Fairly started—
A telegram—
Sober—
A long night—
Ride home—
Palpitation of the heart—
Crawfordsville—
The inevitable—
No friends, money, nor clothes—
One hundred miles from home—
I take a walk—
Clinton County—
Engage to teach a school—
The lobbies of hell—
Arrested—
Flight to the country—
Open school—
A failure—
Return home—
The beginning of a terrible experience—
Two months of uninterrupted drinking—
Coatless, hatless, and, bootless—
The "Blue Goose"—
Inflammatory rheumatism—
The torments of religion—
Walking on crutches—
Drive to Rushville—
Another priest—
Pawn my clothes—
At Indianapolis—
A cold bath—
The consequence—
Teaching school—
Satisfaction given—
The kindness of his wife—
A paying practice at law.
The "Baxter Law"—
Its injustice—
Appetite controlled by legislation—
Indictments—
What they amount to—
"Not guilty"—
The Indianapolis police—
The Rushville grand jury—
Start home afoot—
Fear—
The coming head-light—
A desire to end my miserable existence—
"Now is the time"—
A struggle in which life wins—
Flight across the fields—
Bathing in dew—
Hiding from the officers—
My condition—
Prayer—
My unimaginable sufferings—
Advised to lecture—
The time I began to lecture.
My first lecture—
A cold and disagreeable evening—
A fair audience—
My success—
Lecture at Fairview—
The people turn out en masse—
At Rushville—
Dread of appearing before the audience—
Hesitation—
I go on stage & am greeted with applause—
My fright—
I throw off my father's old coat & stand forth—
Begin to speak, and soon warm to my subject—
I make a lecture tour—
Four hundred & seventy lectures in Indiana—
The aid of the good—
Opposition and falsehood—
Unkind criticism—
Tattle mongers—
My fall—
Attempt to commit suicide—
Inflict an ugly but not dangerous wound on myself—
Ask the sheriff to lock me in the jail.
Struggle for life—
A cry of warning—
"Why don't you quit?"—
Solitude, separation, banishment—
No quarter asked—
The rumseller is a priest—
A risk no man should incur—
The bloated druggist—
The three distinct properties of religion—
Ten days in Cincinnati—
The stick that turned to a serpent—
A world of devils—
Flying in dread—
My condition grows worse.
Recovery—
Trip to Maine—
Lecturing in that state—
The "Dare To Do Right" reformer—
Return to Indianapolis—
Lecturing—
Newspaper extracts—
The criticisms of the press—
Private letters of encouragement—
Friends dear to memory—
Sacred names.
At home again—
Overwork—
Shattered nerves—
Downward to hell—
Conceive of traveling with someone—
Leave Indianapolis with General Macauley—
Separate from him at Buffalo—
I go on to New York alone—
Trading clothes for whiskey—
Delirious wanderings—
Thirteen years at the Corcoran—
Jersey City—
In the calaboose—
Deathly sick—
An insane neighbor—
Another—
In court—
"John Dalton"—
"Here! your honor"—
Discharged—
Boston—
Drunk—
At the residence of Junius Brutus Booth—
Lecturing again—
Home—
Converted—
Go to Boston—
Attend the Moody and Sankey meetings—
Get drunk—
Home once more—
Committed to the asylum—
Reflections—
The shadow which whispered "Go away!"
A sleepless night—
Try to write on the following day but fail—
Friends consult the institution—
I am discharged—
Go to Indianapolis and get drunk—
My condition at present—
The end.
Frozen feet—
Riding in a buggy surrounded by devils—
Fears and sorrows—
No rest.
Wretchedness and degradation—
Clothes, credit, and reputation all lost—
The prodigal's return to his father's house—
Familiar scenes—
The beauty of nature—
My lack of feeling—
A wild horse—
I ride him to Raleigh and get drunk—
A mixture of vile poison—
My ride and fall—
The broken stirrups—
My father's search—
I get home once more—
Depart the same day on the wild horse—
Yearning for sympathy.
The ever-recurring spell—
Writing in the sand—
Hartford City—
In the Ditch—
Fairly started—
A telegram—
Sober—
A long night—
Ride home—
Palpitation of the heart—
Crawfordsville—
The inevitable—
No friends, money, nor clothes—
One hundred miles from home—
I take a walk—
Clinton County—
Engage to teach a school—
The lobbies of hell—
Arrested—
Flight to the country—
Open school—
A failure—
Return home—
The beginning of a terrible experience—
Two months of uninterrupted drinking—
Coatless, hatless, and, bootless—
The "Blue Goose"—
Inflammatory rheumatism—
The torments of religion—
Walking on crutches—
Drive to Rushville—
Another priest—
Pawn my clothes—
At Indianapolis—
A cold bath—
The consequence—
Teaching school—
Satisfaction given—
The kindness of his wife—
A paying practice at law.
The "Baxter Law"—
Its injustice—
Appetite controlled by legislation—
Indictments—
What they amount to—
"Not guilty"—
The Indianapolis police—
The Rushville grand jury—
Start home afoot—
Fear—
The coming head-light—
A desire to end my miserable existence—
"Now is the time"—
A struggle in which life wins—
Flight across the fields—
Bathing in dew—
Hiding from the officers—
My condition—
Prayer—
My unimaginable sufferings—
Advised to lecture—
The time I began to lecture.
My first lecture—
A cold and disagreeable evening—
A fair audience—
My success—
Lecture at Fairview—
The people turn out en masse—
At Rushville—
Dread of appearing before the audience—
Hesitation—
I go on stage & am greeted with applause—
My fright—
I throw off my father's old coat & stand forth—
Begin to speak, and soon warm to my subject—
I make a lecture tour—
Four hundred & seventy lectures in Indiana—
The aid of the good—
Opposition and falsehood—
Unkind criticism—
Tattle mongers—
My fall—
Attempt to commit suicide—
Inflict an ugly but not dangerous wound on myself—
Ask the sheriff to lock me in the jail.
Struggle for life—
A cry of warning—
"Why don't you quit?"—
Solitude, separation, banishment—
No quarter asked—
The rumseller is a priest—
A risk no man should incur—
The bloated druggist—
The three distinct properties of religion—
Ten days in Cincinnati—
The stick that turned to a serpent—
A world of devils—
Flying in dread—
My condition grows worse.
Recovery—
Trip to Maine—
Lecturing in that state—
The "Dare To Do Right" reformer—
Return to Indianapolis—
Lecturing—
Newspaper extracts—
The criticisms of the press—
Private letters of encouragement—
Friends dear to memory—
Sacred names.
At home again—
Overwork—
Shattered nerves—
Downward to hell—
Conceive of traveling with someone—
Leave Indianapolis with General Macauley—
Separate from him at Buffalo—
I go on to New York alone—
Trading clothes for whiskey—
Delirious wanderings—
Thirteen years at the Corcoran—
Jersey City—
In the calaboose—
Deathly sick—
An insane neighbor—
Another—
In court—
"John Dalton"—
"Here! your honor"—
Discharged—
Boston—
Drunk—
At the residence of Junius Brutus Booth—
Lecturing again—
Home—
Converted—
Go to Boston—
Attend the Moody and Sankey meetings—
Get drunk—
Home once more—
Committed to the asylum—
Reflections—
The shadow which whispered "Go away!"
A sleepless night—
Try to write on the following day but fail—
Friends consult the institution—
I am discharged—
Go to Indianapolis and get drunk—
My condition at present—
The end.
